And holding hands and drinking cocktails and counting calories and stealing your chips but claiming to only want a salad and watching The Notebook.
I’m sorry but I am absolutely fed up to the back teeth of these fan pages that seem to have sprung up on Facebook with names like ’50 things guys ought to learn about girls’. Or, sorry, ’50 Things Guy’s Ought Too Learn About Girl’s’.
Perhaps people with poor grammar are a separate class of individual of which all the females do like nothing but shoes and chocolate while the guys talk about football and drink Carlsberg and don’t understand PMS. Otherwise I can’t really understand the phenomenon.
Why is it that these groups claim to have some kind of semi-serious insight into the female psyche as a lesson for men, when the mistake they’re making by generalising so completely about 51% of the population actually means you come away knowing less about girls than you did when you were just bumbling along and not realising that what I want, when you want to say sorry, more than anything in the world, the best possible way of expressing your heartfelt apology, is to give me a teddybear the size of a small fridge.
No, wait, that’s exactly what I’d like. Sorry if I sounded so sarcastic there. How did men ever cope before some lovely blonde twenty-something girl in New Look heels that look a bit like Manolos in the semi-darkness sat down and wrote them a list, in 50 points, that tells you everything you could wish to know about every single girl, because obviously we’re all the same.
Oh, and I really don’t like The Notebook. Or Rachel McAdams (though she was good in Sherlock Holmes). And I really didn’t like her in The Time Traveller’s Wife, which if you ask me was even worse than The Notebook.