Sleep, I Miss You, Come Back, All Is Forgiven.

I haven’t had a decent night’s sleep in nearly a week. On Wednesday night I went out for L’s birthday; I revised until late on Thursday, I went to see some friends and a large quantity of gin (twice, thanks to A, who rather suffered in drinking games) on Friday, on Saturday and last night I had bad nights for assorted reasons (Saturday being a real Cloudlife moment), and having finally dropped off at around 7am this morning, and pretty fitfully at that, I am still awake tonight, partly out of the fear of being unable to sleep, and partly because I am no longer tired. This is annoying. Tomorrow night I will break out the Nytol and go to bed at ten.

I don’t know why I tell you all this – I have real friends, in the real world, to whom I can bitch as much as I like about the sleep I do or do not get; I can always talk to A, for starters, then there’s R and M who are both invaluable, numerous people at the ends of numerous phone lines, but I don’t feel the need to have a Big Conversation about any of this, merely to say look, this is me, here I am, and this is what I am experiencing, and it’s a bit of a pain but it’s nothing I need to talk about. I just can’t sleep, and right now there’s no-one I want to say that to except the ether, people removed enough to choose to comment if they will, to choose to read or not, to choose to completely ignore, and that’s entirely up to you and that’s just how I like it. Do you know what I mean?



Filed under Friendship, Happenings, Internet, Life

6 responses to “Sleep, I Miss You, Come Back, All Is Forgiven.

  1. Lucy

    I sympathise, and hug. I literally can’t remember the last time I slept through the night, but it hasn’t been for weeks. It’s not even that I have problems getting to sleep, but I’m constantly waking and dipping in and out from 4am or 5am onwards. The neighbour who plays loud music which reverberates through the house on weekend nights doesn’t help either.

    And shit, just so, so tired…!

  2. standingonthebrink

    Sorry to hear you’re having trouble sleeping too, Lucy – I am resorting now to Nytol, which although it takes ages to knock me out, then does so and I sleep very well for a good ten hours solid and wake up feeling nicely well-rested. It’s an over-the-counter medicine so it might be worth asking whether you can take it with your other medication but it should be fine. Oh, and I now have earplugs and an eyemask, so as and when the eyemask arrives I can put myself into sensory deprivation and then it’ll just be me that’ skeeping myself awake, if awake I am kept.

    And I’m glad you know what I mean. But then, I guess, that’s one of the main reasons why we blog, isn’t it?

  3. Mia

    I know exactly how you feel. I can’t even remember the last time I had a good night’s sleep. It’s ridiculous (but very, VERY useful if you’re into middle-of-the-night revision.)

    And yes, ’tis indeed one of the main reasons why we blog. It’s good to see that someone else, somewhere miles away from you understands and sympathises. πŸ˜€

  4. Flix

    I slept for a whole eight hours last night. It was wonderful.

  5. standingonthebrink

    I’m glad πŸ™‚ – and, oddly, I didn’t sleep too badly either and managed to get out of bed before eleven, for the first time in a week – what usually happens is that I finally fall asleep somewhere in between five and eight in the morning and then wake up around lunchtime, but I must have dropped off earlier last night, which was great :).

    Now, driving lesson…


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