When I came here I was the kind of girl who was happiest in jeans and a man’s jumper, whose absolute limit on make-up was concealer, mascara and lipgloss (or possibly some black shadow if it was a *really* big-deal event) and who hated dress’n’heels type events; who hoped to find friends at uni with whom she could go to pubs and sit around casually chatting in hoodies and jeans rather than going to clubs in dresses, heels and *gasp* false eyelashes.
Somehow over the last few months, though, I’ve gained confidence. Now, not only will I gladly put on a dress to go out in, I’ll match it with tights in a stupid colour or pattern, mess my hair up good and proper and add a dash of alarmingly red lipstick. I’ve worn a pair of pink feather false eyelashes, and would do so again. I own a pair of gigantic gold heels. Once we all went out in gigantic white shirts covered in paint, with paintbrushes and berets, stereotypical-artist style, and looked bloody awesome (despite a photo in which I look like a pregnant alcoholic…). Daywear is quite acceptably one of many slightly odd dresses and an old cardigan of my father’s, and I’m about to go out shopping in the sunshine wearing a pair of heart-shaped sunglasses (Edit: On this trip I purchased two bikinis and about a billion new bras, all of which a billion times better and more flattering than previous bras I’ve owned, and one of which is even strapless. The expedition didn’t even drive me to tears, which bra-shopping as a full afternoon’s activity usually does! Progress!)
I still don’t consider myself pretty or good-looking in any way, but I’ve gained the confidence to enjoy dressing up and to find things which I genuinely think look good on me, in a completely mad and clashing way, in a ‘go on, look at me’ way, and not just in a ‘well, this dress somehow hides my stomache and minimises my thighs; therefore I look nice’ sort of a way. Don’t know why that should be but it is. I’ve gone just a bit girly, and I love it.
That said I do still own, love, and wear those men’s jumpers everywhere…